About Urs Trulee, CBE

AGE: 32

ETHNICITY: White British (but absolutely open to others)

SEXUALITY: Ever Fluid.

TRAINING: MA in ‘Deception and Disguise’ from Southampton Polytechnic. BA Hons in Communications combined with Media Studies, Travel & Tourism and Classical Drama from The Open University. Three Bs and a C at ALevel. A good set of GCSE’s (certificates for these cannot be supplied).

HONOURS: Commander Of The British Empire, est. 2014, for services to Journalism and Freelance Estate Agenting.

CURRENT OCCUPATION: Freelance Covert Investigative Journo. Exposing idiots and corruption at the highest level.

PREVIOUS OCCUPATION: Junior Editor at The Guardian (at the time this position had a different title, for legal reasons I am obliged to include that here: Unpaid Intern). Secretary to the Chief at Woman’s Weekly. Senior Sales Assistant at Foxtons, Tooting Broadway & Bec.

LOCATION: London, UK.

IF YOU ARE IN DANGER, IF YOU KNOW OF CORRUPTION, IF YOU NEED SOMEONE – DO NOT CALL THE GHOSTBUSTERS OR THE A TEAM – I DO BEG OF YOU – CALL ME (I PREFER TO BE EMAILED) URS TRULEE. WHY? BECAUSE I’M TRULY YOURS. GOD BLESS, SPEED AND KNOWS! UTX

 

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